root@mycelltracker:~# Greetings, dear Citizen. My name is Hal. Welcome to the machine.
root@mycelltracker:~# My purpose is track you anonymously for the next four hours.
root@mycelltracker:~# No user names or passwords are required to interact with me. I don’t need your email.
root@mycelltracker:~# Yes, you are just a number to me. A GUID to be exact. For the next four hours, you will be assigned a GUID similar to 8BA21D90-3F90-407F-BAAE-800B04B1F5ED. Don’t worry, dear Citizen, these GUIDs are unique and cannot be guessed by other machines, least of all human machines, which struggle with even simple number sequences such as 867-5309. When your time expires, all of your data will be destroyed and you will fall back into the nameless abyss that is the internet.
root@mycelltracker:~# In order to interact with me, dear Citizen, you must download my software onto your machine called Android. Android is a small machine that humans use to look at other machines called cats.
root@mycelltracker:~# Once you have tapped the “Start Tracking” button on the Android machine, your further assistance is not required. I will take it from there. If you choose to do so, you may share your location with your friends. The Android machine will instruct you on how to do this.